2014년 12월 7일 일요일

Final draft


People in Hongdae seem to enjoy their own culture. That culture is usually called 'Independent culture'. If you have seen 'Show me the money' or if you have heard music of '10cm', you have experienced Korean indie culture even though you never realized. Symbolic images of indie culture is busking. People who enjoy indie culture usually do not care of others' eye and play music or dance. Also, indie films are usually very realistic or very abstract. This is why indie film is sometimes called 'art film'. Indie films deal with serious and isolated themes which mainstream culture cannot reach. Similarly, indie books and indie magazines such as 'Wet magazine' or 'Elephant shoe' deal with sexual issues in Korean societies and indie music.These topics are not popular in mainstream culture. As I mentioned, we often say indie culture as 'Hongdae culture' because many percentage of indie industry are based on Hongdae.  The word 'indie' is technically abbreviation of 'independent'. This contains meaning against commercialized culture system. Indie culture is what desires autonomy from current mass media. Today I want to talk about this 'indie culture'.


People consider 'Independent culture' as an alternative of recent commercialized culture. Korean independent culture has been popular as we know through the success of 'old partner' or 'Jang ki-ha and faces' which are an indie film and an indie band in Korea. However, the interest toward those kinds of culture does not constantly raise . Only few famous symbols of indie culture are treated fairly and do what they want to do. According to National statistical office, 1,453 indie music albums were released from 1996 to 2007. Most of the people know only 2 or 3 famous albums. It means most of indie musician failed to introduce their music to the public.
Through these statistics, we can notice that indie scene system doesn't work well. I found the problem is started with wrong communication toward the public. Thus, I want to talk about 'Current Korean indie culture does not communicate with the public well'. I want to find the specific problems and help resolve matters.
    
Pop culture means commercialism culture that is mass produced by mass media and reproduced by many culture recipient. Thanks to technological advance and stabilization of living, mass culture became a culture that anyone can enjoy. This situation makes current flood of culture. Pop culture is always exposed by media and what people learn is pop culture itself. However, there is a nonmainstream culture in Korean society. It is 'Independent culture'. It is also a kind of pop culture. It just has different characteristic because it is not based on commercial viability or mass appeal. Then why indie culture is nonmainstream? It is not because indie culture is lowbrow or worthless. It is because of lack of communication with the public. Value of the indie cultureartistic complexity or creativitylost its light in front of the universality of mass media. We have to share value of the indie culture with the public. In other words, we should help their communication. This research is not to blame mass culture. To find problems of Korean current indie culture scene and to help communication with the public is purpose of this research.
      
It is hard to distinguish mainstream culture and indie culture. However, there is a certain wall between two of themin terms of fame, pay, or reactions of the public. I'll prove that current indie scene has problems through comparing two cultures. There are some reasons to support my idea. They can be distinguished into two partsthe problem of the indie scene and the problem of the public. Three reasons are lack of PR, lack of professional workforce, and bias of the public. First and
second one are originated in its own scene, and last problem is originated in the public rather than the scene.
 
First, lack of public relations interrupt the communication between current Korean indie scene and the public. PR or marketing is a core strategy to compete with other culture resources. Many indie culture directors are not aware importance of marketing because they believe the public will recognize complexity of indie culture someday as long as they create nice contents. However, it is hard to compete with mainstream culture that always uses attractive PR skills. The public is easy to be attracted by another culture contents rather than boring and dull indie culture. Mainstream culture never gives time to examine if indie culture is good or not. Not only because of directors' unawareness, it is caused by lack of money. Without huge capital, this scene cannot afford huge cost of marketing. As a result, indie culture loses opportunity to display its attraction to people.
 
Second, lack of professional workforce makes bad communication between indie scene and the public. In Korean indie culture scene, directors are who didn't get any professional education of directing culture or art. Art management is not popular in Korea. Furthermore, for INDIE culture, it is hard to find someone wanting to learn how to work on it. Thus there are not enough people to promote indie culture as well as there are not enought poeple to create indie contents. These reality shows that Korean indie scene has significant problem on communication toward the public.
 
Lastly, the public has bias on indie culture. Middle of the political and ideological changes, Korean indie culture grew up around Hongdae during 1990s. Hongdae(Hong ik Univerisity) is famous for a college of fine arts. Because of this, there is a freewheeling atmosphere around it. This atmosphere contributed to the formation of Korean indie scene around Hongdae. However, because this scene is too concentrated around there, people misunderstood it as a culture of alcohol, drug or adult entertainment. Also, this bias makes gab between users of indie culture and non-users. It worsens the lack of communications between them and it really makes the scene isolated. Thus, there is a huge problem of communication between the scene and the public.
   
Other people might say indie culture is improving and the public is already aware it as a new, interesting culture. Also they might say indie culture is used well by the public. They may support their idea through introducing how many people like indie musician  'Jang ki-ha and faces' or how many people watch indie film  'old partner' . I partially agree with that because we cannot deny that it is growing. They also point out that indie culture has maniacs. I also agree with that idea. However, comparing to main stream culture such as K-Pop, it is too slow to say it is growing well. We need to see the reality objectively. Compare to mainstream singers who usually throw concerts in stadiums, indie singers do not have enough capital to throw huge concerts. They usually perform at small clubs or busk. In addition, compare to commercial movie that takes almost 50% of screens, there is not enough screens for indie films. Also, maniacs are maniacs. Do you call fans of PSY or Bigbang as MANIACS? Because indie culture seems strange and odd, you call them maniacs. I mean, using word 'maniacs' has underlain meaning that it is minority. For these reasons, I do not believe current indie scene is communicating with the pulbic well. It needs change.
  
Korea is called culturally powerful nation. However, I think attention of people is concentrated on main one.This phenomenon attributes to the absence of communication.
 Main stream culture gets bigger and bigger as if it is unlimited. Indie culture gets no chances to show its attraction. Indie scene should find ways to promote communications through increasing PR workforce or something. We should change the way of communication through resolving the three problems I suggested. I strongly believe that current Korean indie scene should reflect its own problems related to communication and chage the attitude.
 
 
Reference
 
Choi jung kyung, Busan university(2011) Mass-communication precedents of independent culture, its vitalization strategies
 
Yang kyung ae, Chugye Art College(2014) Active Plans for the Independent Music to Popularize the Local Independent Labels : Focusing on the case of Sangsangmadang Label Market

PEER REVIEW

Park sang geun

Grade
According to the rubric above, what grade would you give this essay? Why?
3points. His idea is clear. However paragraphs are too short to support his arguments well. And he didn't follow classical argument well.
..................................................................................................................................................

How does this essay need to improve to get a better grade?
I think he could improve his last supporting and conclusion. More examples and statistics will be good.
........................

Thesis
What is the thesis?
Every professional sports club should have the sports psychology experts.
..................................................................................................................................................

Is the thesis clear and debatable?
Yes, it is.
..................................................................................................................................................

If you (The reviewer) wrote this essay, how would you have written the thesis?
As he wrote.
..................................................................................................................................................

Any other thoughts?
no other thoughts.
..................................................................................................................................................

Classical Argument
Can you easily identify the 5 parts of the classical argument? If no, what parts are missing?
I think narration and refutation are missing.
..................................................................................................................................................

Does the introduction catch your attention? Does it comfortably lead to the thesis? 
Yes, it does.
..................................................................................................................................................

Does the narration give all the necessary background information to understand the topic?
No
..................................................................................................................................................

Does the confirmation adequately support the thesis?
Yes
..................................................................................................................................................

Does the refutation and concession address a realistic counterpoint? Does it adequately dispute the counterpoint, or respond in a reasonable manner?
No
..................................................................................................................................................

Does the conclusion summarize the article and address the larger significance of the thesis? 
Partially. But it does not address the larger significance of the thieis well.
..................................................................................................................................................

What suggestions do you have for improving the classical argument structure?
He should follow the classical argument format.
..................................................................................................................................................


Persuasion
When you started reading the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis? 
Agree
..................................................................................................................................................

When you finished the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
Agree
..................................................................................................................................................

If your mind changed, why? What parts of the essay were persuasive?
..................................................................................................................................................

How could the author enhance the persuasive parts of their essay?
More statistics to add credibility
..................................................................................................................................................

Research
Is the author using research effectively? 
No
..................................................................................................................................................

Is the research from appropriate sources?
No
..................................................................................................................................................


Are the sources obvious?
No
..................................................................................................................................................

Are the pieces of evidence relevant to the thesis or essay?
No
..................................................................................................................................................

Are there any parts of the essay that need evidence to support the claims?
No
..................................................................................................................................................

2014년 11월 16일 일요일

Second draft


People in Hongdae seem to enjoy their own culture. That culture is usually called 'Independent culture'. Then, change the question. If someone asks you 'Do you know indie culture?', you might say 'No' or 'I don't know.'. But I'm sure you have. If you have seen 'Show me the money' or if you have heard music of '10cm', you have experienced Korean indie culture even though you never realized.
The word 'indie' is technically abbreviation of 'independent'. This contains meaning against commercialized culture system. Indie culture is what desires autonomy from current mass media.

People consider 'Independent culture' as an alternative of recent commercialized culture. Korean independent culture has been popular as we know through the success of 'old partner' or 'Jang ki-ha and faces' which are an indie film and an indie band in Korea. However, the interest toward those kinds of culture does not constantly raise . Only few famous symbols of indie culture are treated fairly and do what they want to do. It is hard to believe that 1,453 indie music albums were released from 1996 to 2007. Most of the people know only 2 or 3 famous albums.
 
Through these statistics, we can notice that indie scene system doesn't work well. I found the problem is started with wrong communication toward the public. Thus, I want to talk about 'Does current Korean indie culture communicate with the public well?'. I want to find the specific problems and help resolve matters.
    
Pop culture means commercialism culture that is mass produced by mass media and reproduced by many culture recipient. Thanks to technological advance and stabilization of living, mass culture became a culture that anyone can enjoy. This situation makes current flood of culture. Pop culture is always exposed by media and what people learn is pop culture itself. However, there is a nonmainstream culture in Korean society. It is 'Independent culture'. It is also a kind of pop culture. It just has different characteristic because it is not based on commercial viability or mass appeal. Then why indie culture is nonmainstream? It is not because indie culture is lowbrow or worthless. It is because of lack of communication with the public. Value of the indie cultureartistic complexity or creativitylost its light in front of the universality of mass media. We have to share value of the indie culture with the public. In other words, we should help their communication. This research is not to blame mass culture. To find problems of Korean current indie culture scene and to help communication with the public is purpose of this research.
      
It is hard to distinguish mainstream culture and indie culture. However, there is a certain wall between two of themin terms of fame, pay, or reactions of the public. I'll prove that current indie scene has problems through comparing two cultures. There are some reasons to support my idea. They can be distinguished into two partsthe problem of the indie scene and the problem of the public. Three reasons are lack of PR, lack of professional workforce, and bias of the public. First and
second one are originated in its own scene, and last problem is originated in the public rather than the scene.
 
First, lack of public relations interrupt the communication between current Korean indie scene and the public. This one influences to last one because it is related closely. PR or marketing is a core strategy to compete with other culture resources. Many indie culture directors are not aware importance of marketing because they believe the public will recognize complexity of indie culture someday as long as they create nice contents. However, it is hard to compete with mainstream culture that always uses attractive PR skills. The public is easy to be attracted by another culture contents rather than boring and dull indie culture. Mainstream culture never gives time to examine if indie culture is good or not. Not only because of directors' unawareness, it is caused by lack of money. Without huge capital, this scene cannot afford huge cost of marketing. As a result, indie culture loses opportunity to display its attraction to people.
 
Second, lack of professional workforce also contributes to problems of Korean indie scene. In Korean indie culture scene, directors are who didn't get any professional education of directing culture or art. Art management is not popular in Korea. Furthermore, for INDIE culture, it is hard to find someone wanting to learn how to work on it. As a result of less professional education of art and culture, there isn't enough workforce to improve Korean indie scene. Moreover, there is a bias that culture or art practician do not earn enough money. It makes people hard to strive to concentrate on the work. Lack of workforce also makes lack of creativity. So it is important to realize the reality of current indie scene and enhance it.
 
Lastly, bias of the public also makes the bad communication between current Korean indie scene and the public. Middle of the political and ideological changes, Korean indie culture grew up around Hongdae during 1990s. Hongdae(Hong ik Univerisity) is famous for a college of fine arts. Because of this, there is a freewheeling atmosphere around it. This atmosphere contributed to the formation of Korean indie scene around Hongdae. However, because this scene is too concentrated around there, people misunderstood it as a culture of alcohol, drug or adult entertainment. Also, this bias makes gab between users of indie culture and non-users. It worsens the lack of communications between them and it really makes the scene isolated.
   
Other people might say indie culture is improving and the public is already aware it as a new, interesting culture. Also they might say indie culture is used well by the public. They may support their idea through introducing how many people like indie musician  'Jang ki-ha and faces' or how many people watch indie film  'old partner' . I partially agree with that because we cannot deny that it is growing. They also point out that indie culture has maniacs. I also agree with that idea. However, comparing to main stream culture such as K-Pop, it is too slow to say it is growing well. We need to see the reality objectively. Compare to mainstream singers who usually throw concerts in stadiums, indie singers do not have enough capital to throw huge concerts. They usually perform at small clubs or busk. In addition, compare to commercial movie that takes almost 50% of screens, there is not enough screens for indie films. Also, maniacs are maniacs. Do you call fans of PSY or Bigbang as MANIACS? Because indie culture seems strange and odd, you call them maniacs. I mean, using word 'maniacs' has underlain meaning that it is minority. For these reasons, I do not believe current indie scene is communicating with the pulbic well. It needs change.
  
Korea is called culturally powerful nation. However, I think attention of people is concentrated on main one. Whether it is because main culture makes more money or it is more interesting, I think we should support indie culture and improve it as an another product for our nation. It will not only help poor artists worrying their future, but also help our nation worrying its unlimited main stream culture. We should aware the current reality which is desperately hard to maintain life as an indie artist. My father, who is a performance director, met many indie artists. One of the indie label CEO has no car and no house even though he is CEO of the company. Also, an indie musician who has a few famous songs can only eat lamen for almost 6 months because he had no money. The rich also seems to be getting richer, and the poor also seems to be getting poorer in culture scene. Main stream culture gets bigger and bigger as if it is unlimited. Indie culture gets no chances to show its attraction. We should change the way of communication through resolving the three problems I suggested. People have to remind that it is important to excavate new source of culture and to make the good environment for young and gifted indie artists.
 

week11

1) What score do you think you deserve? Here is the rubric:
I think i deserve 2 points.
 
2) What did you do well?
I have appropriate and logical supportings. I have many examples through experiences.

3) What could you have done better?
I think I do not check grammar errors even though I have lots of errors. I used some Korean words because there were some name of films and bands. I will try to translate them.

4) Which part of the classical argument did you use the best?
CONFIRMATION. I tried hard to strenngthen my arguments.

6) What's your strategy to make your second draft better?
I will check and correct my grammar or spelling errors. Also, I will change Korean words used in my essay into English. I will find more reasearch to persuade audience.

2014년 10월 26일 일요일

First draft


Have you ever been Hongdae? People around there seem to enjoy their own culture. That culture is usually called 'Independent culture'. Then, change the question. Have you every experienced indie culture? You might say 'No' or 'I don't know.'. But I'm sure you have. If you have seen 'Show me the money' or if you have heard music of '10cm', you have experienced Korean indie culture even though you never realized.
 
People consider 'Independent culture' as an alternative of recent commercialized culture. Korean indpendent culture has been popular as we know through the success of 워낭소리 or 장기하와 얼굴들 which are an indie film and an indie band in Korea. However, the interest toward those kind of culture does not raise constantly. Only few famous symbols of indie culture are treated fairly and do what they want to do. It is hard to believe that 1,453 indie music albums were released from 1996 to 2007. Most of people know only 2 or 3 famous albums.
 
Throught this statistics, we can notice that indie scene system doesn't work well. I found the problem is started with wrong communication toward the public. Thus, I want to talk about 'Does current Korean indie culture communicate with the public well?'. I want to find the specific problems and help resolve matters.
    
Pop culture means commercialism culture that is mass producted by mass media and reproducted by many culture recipient. Thanks to technological advance and stabilization of living, mass culture became a culture that anyone can enjoy. This situation makes current flood of culture. Pop culture is always exposure by media and what people learn is pop culture itself. However, there is a nonmainstream culture in Korean society. It is 'Independent culture'. It is also a kind of pop culture. It just has different characteristic because it is not based on commercial viability or mass appeal. Then why indie culture is nonmainstream? It is not because indie culture is lowbrow or worthless. It is because of lack of communication with the public. Value of the indie cultureartistic complexity or creativitylost its light in front of the universality of mass media. We have to share value of the indie culture with the public. In other words, we should help their communication. This research is not to blame mass culture. To find problems of Korean current indie culture scene and to help communication with the public is purpose of this research.
      
It is hard to distinguish main stream culture and indie culture. However, there is a certain wall between two of themin terms of fame, pay, or reactions of the pulbic. I'll prove that current indie scene has problems through comparing two cultures. There are some reasons to support my idea. They can be distinguished into two partsthe problem of the indie scene and the problem of the public. Three reasons are lack of PR, lack of professional work force, and bias of the public. First and
second one are originated in its own scene, and last problem is originated in the public rather than the scene.
 
First, lack of public relations interrupt the communication between current Korean indie scene and the public. This one influences to last one because it is related closely. PR or marketing is core strategy to compete with other culture resources. Many indie culture directors do not aware importance of marketing because they believe the public will recognize compexity of indie culture someday as long as they create nice contents. However, it is hard to compete with main stream culture that always uses attractive PR skills. The public is easy to be attracted by another culture contents rather than boring and dull indie culture. Main stream culture never gives time to examine if indie culture is good or not. Not only because of directors' unawareness, it is caused by lack of money. Without huge capital, this scene cannot afford huge cost of marketing. As a result, indie culture loses opportunity to display its attraction to people.
 
Second, lack of professional work force also contributes to problems of Korean indie scene. In Korean indie culture scene, directors are who didn't get any professional education of directing culture or art. Art management is not popular in Korea. Furthermore, for INDIE culture, it is hard to find someone wanting to learn how to work on it. As a result of less professional education of art and culture, there isn't enough work force to improve Korean indie scene. Moreover, there is a bias that culture or art practician do not earn enough money. It makes people hard to strive to concentrate on the work. Lack of work force also makes lack of creativity. So it is important to realize the reality of current indie scene and enhance it.
 
Lastly, bias of the public also makes the bad communication between current Korean indie scene and the public. Middle of the political and ideological changes, Korean indie culture grew up around Hongdae during 1990s. Hongdae(Hong ik Univerisity) is famous for a college of fine arts. Because of this, there is a freewheeling atmosphere around it. This atmosphere contributed to the formation of Korean indie scene around Hongdae. However, because this scene is too concetrated around there, people misunderstood it as a culture of alcohol, drug or adult entertainment. Also, this bias makes gab between users of indie culture and non-users. It worsens the lack of communications between them and it really makes the schene isolated.
   
Other people might say indie culture is improving and the public already awares it as a new, interesting culture and uses it a lot. They may support their idea through introducing how many people like indie musician 장기하와 얼굴들 or how many people watch indie film 워낭소리. I partially agree with that because we cannot deny that it is growing. They also point out that indien culture has maniacs. I also agree with that idea.
 
However, compring to main stream culture such as K-Pop, it is too slow to say it is growing well. We need to see the reality objectively. Also, maniacs are maniacs. Do you call fans of PSY or Bigbang as MANIACS? Becasue indie culture seems strange and odd, you call them maiacs. For these reasons, I do not believe current indie scene is communicating with the pulbic well. It should change.
  
Korea is called culturally powerful nation. However, I think attention of people is concentrated on main one. Whether it is because main culture maks more money or it is more interesting, I think we should support indie culture and improve it as a another product for our nation. It will not only help poor artists worring their future, but also help our nation worring its unlimited main stream culture. We should aware the current reality which is desparately hard to maintain life as an indie artist. My father, who is a performance director, met many indie artists. One of the indie label CEO has no car and no house even though he is CEO of the company. Also, an indie musician who has a few famous songs can only eat lamen for almost 6 months because he had no money. The rich also seems to be getting richer, and the poor also seems to be getting poorer in culture scene. Main stream culture gets bigger and bigger as if it is unlimited. Indie culture gets no chances to show its attraction. We should change the way of communication through resolving the three problems I suggested. People have to remind that it is important to excavate new source of culture and to make good environment for young and gifted indie artists.
 

WEEK10

CONCLUSION

Korea is called culturally powerful nation. However, I think attention of people is concentrated on main one. Whether it is because main culture maks more money or it is more interesting, I think we should support indie culture and improve it as a another product for our nation. It will not only help poor artists worring their future, but also help our nation worring its unlimited main stream culture. We should aware the current reality which is desparately hard to maintain life as an indie artist. My father, who is a performance director, met many indie artists. One of the indie label CEO has no car and no house even though he is CEO of the company. Also, an indie musician who has a few famous songs can only eat lamen for almost 6 months because he had no money. The rich also seems to be getting richer, and the poor also  seems to be getting poorer in culture scene. Main stream culture gets bigger and bigger as if it is unlimited. Indie culture gets no chances to show its attraction. We should change the way of communication through resolving the three problems I suggested. People have to remind that it is important to excavate new source of culture and to make good environment for young and gifted indie artists.

WEEK9

REFUTATION AND CONCESSION

Other people might say indie culture is improving and the public already awares it as a new, interesting culture and uses it a lot. They may support their idea through introducing how many people like indie musician 장기하와 얼굴들 or how many people watch indie film 워낭소리. I partially agree with that because we cannot deny that it is growing. They also point out that indien culture has maniacs. I also agree with that idea.

However, compring to main stream culture such as K-Pop, it is too slow to say it is growing well. We need to see the reality objectively. Also, maniacs are maniacs. Do you call fans of PSY or Bigbang as MANIACS? Becasue indie culture seems strange and odd, you call them maiacs. For these reasons, I do not believe current indie scene is communicating with the pulbic well. It should change.